Chicken Recipe: My experiments with Cooking June 18, 2010

I always wondered all these years how my mother makes yummy lip smacking delicacies. Trust me; it’s a real tough job guys. I recently realized the intensity of it as I myself tried my hand in cooking to have something made for my dinner. If there is one thing I thank god everyday for, then it’s the fact that he created chicken. Indeed that’s where I planned to start my cooking regime from and hence my preparations (trouble) began…

Step 1 (Trouble 1): Buying a chicken and other ingredients

I surfed www.sanjeevkapoor.com for a perfect chicken recipe. Now don’t wonder who Sanjeev Kapoor is! Nopes, he is not the of Karishma and Kareena ; he is the Khana Khazana cooking serial chef on Zee TV channel. Armed with the list of ingredients required, I set course to Reliance Fresh store near my house. As soon as I entered the store, I was welcomed by this weird recorded voice coming from the loud speaker saying “Delight store adjacent to reliance fresh. You will find fresh non veg items like chicken, mutton, fish, eggs etc. “Cool man ,my search for the chicken ends” I thought as I procedded to buy the other ingredients first. I opened the word document of list in my mobile to item hunting. But wait! All the items are in Hindi and all items in the store were in English. You don’t expect someone to have a PhD in English to Hindi synonyms of food items before making a simple recipe! Fortunately, I found a messenger from god (attendee of Reliance Fresh J )who showed me the items to make my beloved chicken. But my supposedly pleasant shopping experience was hindered by the very irritating recording that had welcomed me when I entred the store. It kept repeating itself every other minute as if some devil has entered my ears and telling me “Come do the sin, buy from Delite store”. Listing to the same recording about chicken, mutton, eggs n blah blah blah continuously gave me this weird feeling that I would turn into a poultry any minute now. I grabbed all the items, billed it and dashed out of the store before I became a hen myself. As soon as I came entered the non-veg store, I sensed the pungent smell of fish. No wonder why they had to keep repeating the irritating announcement to attract customers. The person inside cut the chicken and handed me the black polythene while I kept my nose closed with my other hand and prayed to get out of here soon. I reached home, washed the pieces and marinated the same. It was time for step 2… grilling!

Step 2 (Trouble 2): The actual preparation

As instructed by Sanjeev Kapoor, I started placing the pieces of marinated chicken on the gauged grilling plate. To my dismay the pieces started falling right through the spaces on the grilling plate. I was so delighted with the Delight store that I hadn’t noticed the size of the pieces when he was cutting the pieces. However I managed to balance them like a professional trampoline performer. I set the microwave and sat to watch TV for a while.

As I lay on the sofa dreaming about the delicious chicken I would be having in a few minutes, I was alerted by the beep sound of microwave informing me that my chicken has been grilled and now ready for gravy. I ran to the microwave and peeped through the front glass of microwave to check the status of grilled chicken. What I saw there was heart sinking…the already tiny winy pieces had become more tiny tots and jet black. I collected was left of the chicken meat which now more or less looked like squirrel meat. On further inspection, I found that the pieces had become so dry and hard that they felt like pieces of bone, probably due to the water content being dried out. I

Step 3: The closure

There is no step 3! !@#$%^&*()  The chicken was of no use to me and I sat in front of the teenie tiny pieces in despair. Slowly I put the pieces in a plastic cover, went down in the lift and spread the pieces down for the neighbors pet dog Tommy who came running towards me wagging his tail. I watched for some time as he started chewing the pieces and probably had his best feast ever. (grilled chicken is a delicacy for dogs I believe). I went back to my home, locked the door and took oath that I will never ever step into the kitchen to cook something because I did not want to become a chef for the dogs. Thus my adventurous expedition to become SANJEEV KAPOOR became the first and the final one….

Booking airline ticket online – IRCTC vs Cleartrip vs Spicejet May 28, 2010

Irctc has started supporting booking airtickets online. That maked business sense considering that the volume of transactions happen every month (over 70 lakh). But for not so frequent flyers, I wanted to see how much value add it provides.

I wanted to try out Irctc first. Now the test data is as follows:

Journey Details: Hyderabad to Coimbatore and return (both on Spicejet)

Dates: Onward 26th June (8:55 am) and return 15th July 2010 (10:45am)

IRCTC: As soon as I clicked on find flights, after a few seconds the message comes up. “The connection was terminated by remote server. Blah blah blah…”. April 2010 data shows that 77% of transactions were a success at IRCTC. That means 23% of transactions were failed. For 70lakh transactions, thats quite a big number. Before giving up I tried searching once more and this time I was able to select the flights. The total fare came down to Rs. 4346.28.

Cleartrip: I find cleartrip quite neat, clean and user friendly. The total fare came to Rs. 4277

Spicejet: Finally I went to the airline’s online booking system itself, chose the flights and they gave me a discount for flying return on their airline. The total came to Rs.4005.

Verdict: Personally I would never book flight tickets on Irctc given their failure rate. Also I dont find the user experience appelaing compared to other sites. Sites like Cleartrip/Makemytrip etc are good enough, but if I am booking tickets on my own, I would rather go to the airline site itself to book ticket at a discounted rate. Airlines like Kingfisher has a frequent flyer programme whcih I would like to take advantage of.  Irctc would work because agents would prefer it as a booking medium since they alreay book train tickets there. Given that many of us fly on business trip and the tickets are booked by company though agents, Irctc would start reaping profit even if they are not upto the mark. Also as an introductory offer, they are giving flat 10% off on flight tickets. Which means, the ticket price in our scenario would come to Rs.3946.28. If you ask me, I would still stick to Spicjet rate of Rs.4005.

Losing my virginity… February 26, 2009

Gotcha! Now that I have your attention, lets make it clear about the virginity I am talking about. Well I donated blood today… first time in my life. The very thought of a  needle piercing my body used to give me shivers. But 2 days back I decided to face my worst fear and registered for a slot today in the blood donation camp being held at Infosys. I feel getting an appoitment with a doctor is more easier than getting a slot for a blood donation camp. In case there are other readers out there who are as afraid as I was, let me walk you though the procedure and also list out some advantages of donating blood. Maybe you will also feel motivated to donate next time you have an oppurtunity.

Advantages:
1.  You have done something noble which could contribute in saving an individuals life. God bless you.
2.  American Medical Association (www.ama-assn.org), that found that giving blood every six months led to fewer heart attacks and strokes.
3.  Fresh blood would be formed in your body would feel refreshed.
4.  Donating blood on a regular basis reduces the iron stores in the body and this study supports the theory that reducing iron appears to preserve heart and vascular health.

Procedure:
The procedure is quite simple and doest take more than 30 mins.
1.  Register first.
2.  Measure your weigth. Then they take your blood sample from left arm using syringe. (Nope it absolutely doesnt pain).
3.  In case your blood count is low, you will not be allowed to donate blood. Eat well and come back later. They will tell your blood group in case you dont know immeditely.
4.  Go in and check blood preassure. If normal, you are ready to donate blood.
5.  Lie down and dont panic seeing the needle and bag. I didnt even relaise when the needle was inserted.
6.  Its just a matter of 10 min and you are done. Eat the biscuts, drink the juice and you are own your way!

A forgotten guy speaks… February 15, 2009

                Wonder who I am? I am the same guy about whom the author of this blog had glorified here when I first came into his life…  yes, I am the same lucky bamboo. The idiot forgot to lock his computer before going to food court for lunch. So I thought why not inform the readers about the emotional depression I am going though every day here. :’( Maybe there is a good psychologist amongst you who can guide me, or maybe there are some good human beings out there who care for me and give moral support.

Look at me! I have grown

                 I was born and bought up in a nursery here in Bangalore. (Yeah, I know. He must have told you that I have been imported from China or something. That’s what the gift shop guys told him and just like every fools, he paid 130 bucks for me.) Anyways, he bought me home and I had an elaborated photoshoot session that very night. I watched as he spammed his friends online with with my gorgeous pics…ehmmm. The next day when I woke up, I found myself in a cubicle at Infosys. From the very first day I was the centre of attraction of all his colleagues. They would joke about how I would grow so tall and dense that the cubicle would turn into a jungle. I used to laugh along with them, but now I really wish i had grown as tall as a coconut tree and drop a few coconuts on his head to remind him that I am still here. People were interested to know how fast I am growing by marking my height on the whiteboard (No the whiteboard is no longer my friend now, will tell you why a bit later) and checking on me again a few days later.

 
                 Initially he took really good care of me. He would often run his fingers along my long leaves and ask me to grow up soon. I don’t think he was much worried about my growth; he was more interested in keeping me healthy and bright green all the time. After all I was the only one he could look upon in order rest his eyes after prolonged exposure to monitor screen. Way back in the gift shop I had once heard a prospective customer who was a doctor argue with his wife as to why he needed real green plants in office to rest his eyes. I wonder whether he had heard the same thing to. Oh I forgot to tell you… he even named me “Milaya” which in Russian means “Darling”. Now i really doubt he had someone else in mind when he chose that name. I had a neatly printed nametag with my new name in bold and a “Windows 7 Ready” emblem written below it. (Boys sometimes get geeky I guess). But I knew my sweet name tag wouldn’t last long when I heard him ask his friend over the phone whether it looks too girlish.

 

                 Time has changed and nowadays he doesn’t spend enough time with me or care for me like before. He does water me regularly, but I need more than that. He has not touched my leafs for weeks now. Few days back he suddenly bought his hands so close to me I was overcome with emotions anticipating the same touch and care. But then his target was the stupid whiteboard where he keeps scribbling junk things about the project. Sometimes he stares at the same whiteboard trying to figure out his own handwriting. (Luckily my new friend Motorokr E6 was kind enough to take a few snapshots of me along with the stupid whiteboard which he has agreed to upload for this post). Look at the pics and you would know what I mean. Now you might say that he might probably be busy with work and stuff. You wouldn’t believe this, but I sometimes feel that my life is at threat. I suspect he is jelous because of the attention people around him are giving to me whenever they pass by the cubicle. 8-|Once he was out of office for a week without telling me (‘Gone to Mysore’, I later found out when I heard his colleagues cribbing about him. ). His friends was kind enough to water me or I would have long been dead!!! But Friday evening they forgot to water me before they went home and by the time he came back next Monday I was nearly dead. I am now studying the legal side of this incident in order to sue him for attempted murder. Any lawyers out there please drop your contact in comments section and I would give you a call after he has left for a day from the desk phone. (Even though he claims that he had asked his friends to water me regularly, I dont really trust him. Girls would agree that boys can sometimes be real greks).

 

Myself & Whiteboard

 

                 Someone please help me out!!! I feel lonely & left out all the time. I cant handle this emotional stress. I happen to overhear that there are some couriers on way to him which would arrive on Monday. If those are valentine’s day gifts, their very presence in the cubicle would be a threat to my existence. I really wish someone had gifted me to him on Valentine ’s Day rather than being bought from a gift shop. Someone please adopt me… technically speaking, steal me away from him. (PS: I would really prefer if my new owner is female & unmarried… cough cough). Don’t worry about stealing me from a secure campus; once you are ready let me know and I would send you detailed plan similar to MI:2. I need to take leave now since its time he would slowly stroll back after a heavy lunch. For all those who think I was selfish talking only about me in this post, I say “Save all my family members, Go green!!!” (Hmmm… I really wonder what ‘Go green’ means. I have heard him talk about a new banking project called Greenfield… I wonder if its related. :S )

                 To end with all environment activists & people with a loving heart who has been touched my sad story, drop some comments in my support. If possible give me a call to his desk phone. In case he picks up tell him that you would like to talk to ‘Milaya’. He would think you are nuts, but I am not really bothered about having nut friends. Looking forward for more care and love… until then, Dasvidaniya.

Lots of love and regards,

 

Milaya

a.k.a Lucky Bamboo,

Lazy guy’s Cubicle,

1st floor, Left wing, Building 53,

Infosys Technologies Limited,

Bangalore, India.

Phone: Really don’t know

Mobile: Motorokr E6 (Errr… am i supposed to give a unique number or something?)

A tale from two sides January 31, 2009

21st September 2008:
Aditi wrote…
I met him for the first time at Hyderabad during my job training. Because of the kind of fun we had during those few months and with the kind of environment provided, it remotely resembled induction training. I am not exaggerating, but it was more like a luxury resort where we were paid to enjoy the facilities provided. And during one of those days, I met him… Shahid. His training was in a different domain and hence I didn’t get much chance of speak to him. Kiss a guy for an hour and it would seem only for a minute, sit on an hot oven for a minute and it would seem like a hour. Before I could blink my eye, the training was already over and our posting locations had come. I was posted at Hyderabad itself and I had to travel to my hometown the next day. By the time I return everyone would be long gone. I wouldn’t find those familiar faces anywhere in the campus from now on. That was probably the last day I had to say it all, coz I would never have a second chance.

‘Friends’-sometime they terribly fail to understand your feelings. He was sitting right next to me in the lounge and chatting with our group of friends. I wish the rest of them could read my mind and go away leaving the two of us alone so that I could gather some courage to spill my feelings for him out. Well I shouldn’t be blaming them, after all they don’t have any mind reading software installed. Still I just wish they had understood me back then. It was just 1am early morning and someone suggested we go to food court and grab some drink. Those days, 1am was like afternoon for us. After all the chit chatting, fun and mischiefs, we would not hit bed not earlier than 6am. J

We were lazily strolling towards the food court and he was walking by my side. Looking back, its been just two weeks when I had finally got a chance to talk openly with him. That was the day when had been to Charminar. I had already purchased pearl set for my mom and he didn’t have a girl friend to buy any. This meant when the girls lured over the ornaments on display and the guys frantically searched for a good piece for their loved ones, we were spared to enjoy some good moments alone. I had found him very friendly from the beginning & felt comfortable being with him. I desperately wanted to spend some time with him. But now when I finally had some time while proceeding to the food court, this idiot has nothing else to talk other than the base locations, the projects that we will get into, and other irrelevant blah blah stuff. We finally reached the deserted food court and proceeded towards the newly installed coke vending machine.

Shahid had his own ways of doing mischief. After much kicking & shaking the machine for not dispensing the coke even after inserting the coins, he came up with elaborate plans as to how we can cheat the machine and take out a few cans without spending a penny. As he got busy executing his ‘evil’ plans, I was lost in my own thoughts about him. How can a person be as serious about his studies as well as so funny with a good sense of humor? I don’t know why but just felt like holding his arms and plead him not to go. All my friends were going to Pune, Bangalore and Chandigarh and I had been posted at Hyderabad itself. Indeed I love Hyderabad, but I just wanted someone to stay back with me. I was going to be all alone after this day… and I really wished the someone was him. Once he is done with, I would ask him for a long walk around the campus alone- I had decided. But did I have the right to ask him out? He was with his so called best friends and I was not even sure whether he considered me close to him. Why do I find it easy to blabber nonstop 24×7, but find myself lost while speaking to him? As you guessed I didn’t have the guts to open my mouth and after having coke we strolled back to the hostel building.

I realized I was running out of time and had to do something really fast. I wanted to talk to him the whole night. We reached the hostel & everyone dispersed; some went to their rooms and some to the labs. I still had lot of packing left because I was leaving the next day to my home town. I wished he would accompany me atleast till the reception, but he moved in the direction of the lab. Soon he would be lost in those stupid counter strike and other LAN games with his friends. “Can we talk for sometime” I was quite surprised hearing myself say that. “Sure, I would love to” he replied with a bright smile. We sat down on the sofa next to each other. The entire place was deserted and the moment I had waited for had finally come. We were alone there and now I could talk my heart out. “So.. when will we meet again” he finally broke the silence. He always asks the wrong question at the wrong time. This question was a reality check for me that this was indeed the last day I would be meeting him. I didn’t have enough courage to look into his eyes for I was sure I would burst out crying. It’s those moments when sudden grief overcomes your emotions for no reason. I was getting the feeling that I would never meet him again in my life. Mentally I was questioning myself… why do I desperately want him?… why do I feel the urge to stay with him?… Whoever said that in love you don’t have answers said the truth. Suddenly I realized that my eyes had already gone watery… a tilt of my head and river of tears would start flowing from my eyes. I knew very well that he wouldn’t stand his friends crying. Maybe the worst decision I ever took… but quickly I got up, said goodbye and said that I am going to the room to do some packing. From his face I could say that he was quite startled by my reaction. He said something which I could barely hear. Did he ask me to stay? I don’t know and I didn’t ask. Something in his voice told me that that there is something he wanted to tell me that he was suppressing inside. Maybe it was the feeling inside me that was making me imagine things. Does he have feelings for me… the question was running in my nerves. I bid a final goodbye and walked towards my room. I turned back to see whether he is still standing there. Too much expectations, he was nowhere around…gone forever from my life. I ran to my room and cried the whole night.
Today we are in contact but just as friends. I wish I had done something back then. I wish I had atleast spoken my heart that day. I wish he had read my eyes. I wish there would have been more to tell you, but the story ended there. Lagta hai jaise hamare beech me bhi sarhade ban gayi hai….Jo sayad hamesha rahegi…..
 
30th January 2009:
Shahid wrote…
“…and so finally you are committed now. You must have readily accepted ” I typed into the messenger with a smiley. “Nope” the reply came almost instantly. “Why not?” I was quite surprised. She had told me numerous times that he was a good company for her and she found it quite comfortable in his company. Between, the first time I was surprised was when she told me a few months back that she was not committed. I mean it’s very difficult to find a girl as beautiful, charming, smart and open minded as her to be single. I don’t know about you, but she was the first person I had met who never had a boyfriend! Any guess why she never had a boyfriend? Her parents would get her married to anyone she wanted to, so that was not the issue. The reason she gave then fell in line with my reasons- not meeting the right person and no intention to attract unnecessary tension.

She had not replied yet for my previous question. Sitting in office in front of my comp, I waited patiently for her reply as I switched between Office Communicator chat window and Visual Studio instances.  Impatient, I pinged her “U there?”. The reply caught me by surprise-  “Duffer” “Idiot” it said. She continued… “The reason I said no was because the person I love…” she paused briefly “…is you!”  By this time I had gone completely blank. I didn’t know what to reply. You might say that it’s not a million dollar question and the answer is very simple- ‘Yes, of course’. But in my case it was not that easy. A year earlier if she had said the same thing, I might have gone mad with happiness. But over a year things have changed. The reason I gave to everyone for being single is that I didn’t meet the right person; but reality is more complicated than that.

 Sister’s marriage didn’t go easy on me, or at home. If you ever had a inter-caste marriage in your family you would know what I mean. Watching loved ones cry didn’t go easy on me. There were even times when I wanted to run off rather than watch the course of events. Maybe those things made me insulated from the fundamental feeling of human emotions- Love. But saying no to a girl like her was absolute stupidity. Maybe I will have to be reborn a hundred times to get a girl like her. I needed a reality check badly, this couldn’t be happening. “Aditi… are you serious?” finally I managed to reply something. “Yes. I wanted you to know this a long time back” she replied. “Since when?”… I still didn’t want to give an answer. “Since we all were chit chatting in food court a few days before leaving… since we went to Charminar… since I avoided meeting on the last day to avoid crying in front of you.” “But why me?” a wrong question to ask you would say. But I really wanted to know. The kind of person she is, she would easily get anyone she want in this world. I was well aware of the long list of guys who had proposed her earlier. “You are nice, friendly and you care” she replied almost instantly like she knew by-heart what to expect someone. Out of these three, I couldn’t think of one point that made me special. “But why not him? From what you said he didn’t sound any different from me. Then why me?” I had to ask. You know me, I always ask wrong questions at the wrong time. “I don’t know. I find it quite comfortable and open while talking with you than him. Now answer me!” she needed an answer and I had to give one real quickly.

Finally I let open my bundle of secrets- “Listen… ever since I met you, I wanted to talk to you. But I couldn’t because you were always with your own circle of friends. I didn’t want to dash lest I wanted to prove myself as a typical flirt. You would remember how I tried to be with you when we went to Charminar. After that I found it very much comfortable talking to you. Aditi, I always wanted you to notice me, but found it very hard to do. I liked you the very first time I met you. You are beautiful and charming. When I got to know you better, the way you are… sweet, smart, loving and caring, I wished from heart you were mine”.  I gave her sometime to digest what I had said before I continued- “But…”. Probably the only word people want to avoid using in any conversation. The word is like a warning for the other person in the conversation is that something quite contradictory is about to be spoken. I had to say it anyway and hence I continued-“… things have changed since then dear. Lot of things have changed me most of which you already know. I don’t want to do it again; I won’t be able to survive it. I need to say this- I like you very much and somewhere inside… I love you.  But I don’t want this emotion to come out. There is no future in this relationship. I don’t want to hurt you in anyway and I don’t want you to repent in future”. After much silence she replied back “Haven’t to hurt me enough already?”. Again the dead silence.

Suddenly my phone rang. It was her SMS. It read -”Always tel sum 1 how u feel,mean wat u say & say wat u mean even ven its hard b’coz opportunities r lost in a blink of an eye but regrets can last a lifetime…”. I started at the message for quite some time. I had forgotten what I was doing. I could feel a avalanche of emotions built inside me. I was sure I would cry out any moment and it would be terrible to do so sitting at office. “Are you alright?” my colleague asked. “Yes” I barely managed to talk still holding & staring at the mobile.  “Are you sure?” he asked again. “Yes, I am. I just remembered that I need to call up someone” and dialled her office number. No reply; she was not at her desk. I called her mobile next and she kept ignoring. Finally she pinged me “Don’t call. There are people near me”. “Were you crying? What was that message for?”-my intuitions kicked in. To be precise I didn’t have anything better to ask. “Leave it. Just know that in this process of sticking with your rules due to what happened in your life earlier, you are hurting me”. I didn’t know what to reply. I just wished we had a remote control in life. I just wish I could go back in time and change a few things. I wish I could tell her how I had wished earlier that this moment that I had dreamed of would become a reality one day. I wish I could be near her right now and say- ‘I love you too’. Dreams do come true, if we only wish hard enough. You can have anything in life if you will sacrifice everything else for it. But when my dream became reality, I was not prepared to sacrifice.

Chandni Chowk To China – Review January 18, 2009

This could probably the last time I would be coming to Infosys Mysore since the project I amworking on here is complete. I have been to Infy Mysore countless times. The sad part is whenever I leave this place back to Bangalore, the movie running at Infosys multiplex would always be a pathetic one (Khoya khoya chand, Lovestory 2050 etc to name a few).  So I was overjoyed when I recieved the mail that it would be Chandni Chowk To China this weekend. Of course I expected something special being a Warner Bros production. Did it meet my expectations?

(No Spoilers)

The movie begins in China with a villain called Hojo (as you might have guesses, a guru in martial arts) taking over a village and forcing villagers to work for him. The villagers sent a few from their clan to India in search of a man who is supposed to be reincarnation of the legend warrior Lie Chaun (or something like that. all Chinese names sound the same anyway ).  A fake astorloger Chopstick (Ranvir Shorey… friend of Akshay) cheats Sidhu(Akshay Kumar), a cook from Chandni Chowk and takes him to China.

Now you must be wondering where Deepika is! Ah, let me tell you a sad story.

Once upon a time in China, there lived a policeman who was father of Brucelee in martial arts. He captured Hojo (the villain i discussed before) and in retaliation Hojo returns to take revenge. At that point of time our police guy was with his wife admiring the beauty of great wall of China with his just born twin daughters. After breaking down half of Great wall of China using martial arts Hojo pushes our police guy into the valley and  takes one of his daughter away. She grows up to become our Chinese Padukone named… he he he… “Meow Meow“. The Indian Padukone’s name is “Sukhi“. Although Deepika doesnt have much of dialogues in the entire movie we did have our part of fun making sound of cats & dogs (Meow Meow, Bhow Bhow) in the theatre.

Story is quite simple… Akshay doesnt know why he has been brought there… Villain comes and increases the bone count in his body… the villagers take him to their Chinese ayurvedic hospital… our now old policeman guy teaches him Kungfu… and Akshay kills Hojo.  Simply said… ek tha raja, ek thi rani, donon mar gayi khatam kahani.

List of Mental Torture Sequences:

1. In the initial sequences, Mithum Chakraborthy (mama of Akshay) kicks Akshay for disobeying him. You wouldn’t believe what I am about to say. Akshay flies to outerspace and then falls back to earth right in front of Mithun. This action is repeated a couple of times until he falls in front of those villages from China searching for the warrior in India.
2. The story was narrated by a voice which sounded like Discovery channel English to Hindi dubbing, which made you wonder whether you are reading “Amar Chitra Katha” or watching a movie. It was more like “Mein samay hoon…” from our good old mahabaratha.
3. The direction was pathetic. At times it looked like the actors were on a stage drama and have forgotten their dialogues.
4. Whenever there were scenes of the Chinese policemen/ Chinese Deepika/ Indian Deepika/ or a permutation & combination of any of the above, a pathetic background music played in the background with a century old photo of the policeman and two baby Deepika’s . This was repeated unnecessarily throughout the movie. The background music reminded you more of the horror movies of Ram Gopal Varma rather than making you emotional.
5. Deepika would be in next James Bond movie. Wondering why? Well she is definitely a gadget woman. She has this belt Made in India and sold though teleshopping which when worn makes the person wearing it dance using a remote control. Do buy one of these next time you go to discos! But make sure the remote doesn’t end up in some other guys hand like it happened in the movie
6. She goes to China for ad-shoot of some products which will make your jaw drop. One of the product was a device which translates Chinese to Hindi perfectly. Quite handy if you are going to China.
7. The ultimate product was an umbrella resistant to knife, bullets or even bazooka. What more, you can jump from the World Trade Centre and this umbrella would act as a parachute like you see in Tom and Jerry cartoons. I think govt should start giving these umbrellas to civilians to protect themselves in case of a nuclear fallout.
8. The umbrella is extensively used to protect from bullet fire and knife throws throughout the movie. One such sequence was when Deepika and Akshay jumps off from a 200 floor building. During the fall Deepika opens the umbrella and both of them flies away happily. During the flight they fall in love. How romantic
9. Remember I told that the policeman was pushed over great wall of China by Hojo. Assume Deepika to be 20 years of age. 20 years later when Deepika offers flowers from the spot this policemen (her dad, but now a bit mental due to the fall) is still sitting there.
10. Soon after this ex-policeman remembers who he is, the next sequence we see him in uniform as a captain at the police station. 20 years later the job is still waiting for you. Maybe the guy was on ‘Bench’  for 20 years, now put into production.
11. Most of the sequences in China is shot on Great Wall of China. China is a huge country… film it at some other places too dumbos.
12. There was not even one comedy sequence in the movie that was worth commenting
13. Akshay gets an aaloo (Potato) with Ganapati like shape on it. He carries it around thought the movie which pans for about 5 months and still doesnt get rotten. Aaloo ho to aisa ho, warna na ho!
14. Deepika sheds exactly one drop of tear whenever she gets emotional which happens too often. Akshay cries a lot too not to be left behind. The emotional scenes are pathetic.
15. Akshay does some stuff like creating storms and hurriance tossing boats in river. Ranjanikath will have stiff competition now.
16. I have written to facilities of the multiplex to provide seatbelts in all seats. Movies like these are the major reason of increase in suicide rates. It gave me a Strong urge to jump off the balcony of the theatre.
17. Makes Lovestory 2050 a super hit in comparison
18. I could go on and on… but i guess you already got a good idea

Best part of the movie:

1. Interval
2. The End

Makes me wonder:

1. Didn’t Warner Bros get any other movie to produce?
2. This movie was released world wide. The reputation of Indian movies would be in ashes by now!
3. Doesn’t Akshay or Deepika read scripts before signing up for movies?
4. Finally, was the director out of his mind?
5. It says “To be conitinued…” in the end. OH NO! :O

Advice:

Do not watch it, even if its free. If someone offers you free ticket for this movie beat the guy up. He/she is your sworn enemy.

Rating:

I have tried to be as generous as possible….

0.01/10

Things I learnt in 2008 January 15, 2009

A happy new year now would make you think that I live in a different planet! Its just that I was too lazy to write it down… and yes my processor runs a bit slow; it took me 15 days to realise what I have learnt, lost and gained in 2008. Anyway here it goes…

I have learn’t the following:

1. Never underestimate yourself!
2. Learn to say “NO”. It’s really useful sometimes.
3. I’ve learned that our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for what we become.
4. I’ve learned that either you control your attitude or it controls you.
5. I’ve learned that no matter how much I care some people just don’t care back.
6. I perform the best under preassure. When I am not sitting on an hot oven, I do things at my own leisure. Need to change that.
7. Don’t expect anything back from anyone. The least you expect, the lesser you would get hurt.  (Similar to the saying ”Expecting the world to be nice to you just because you are nice to others is like expecting the lion not to eat you because you are a vegetarian.’)
8. Have goals, dream big.
9. I can be a bit more intuitive and proactive.
10. Try to live in the present
11. Never give up!

Best Moments: Infosys Enterprise Solutions training at Hyderabad. Made lots of friends and had a great time. Probably some of the best moments of my life.

Worst Moments: Points 5 & 7

Good luck for 2009! Between… what did you learn?

Lucky Bamboo November 9, 2008

Last week we went shopping to Brand factory, Marthahalli. We didn’t buy the stuff we had planned, but bought a lot of stuff which we never intended to buy. My hunt for an indoor plant for my cubicle came true during a random visit to gift shop the same night.

After I purchased it for Rs.130 (including bowl) I came to know that its called lucky bamboo even though its not real bamboo. Its based on Feng-Sui principles. This apparatus contains all five element of feng-sui and is be believed to bring good luck. All these stuff I came to know though my roomie and Google.

 Anyway its a good indoor plant since it requires negligible sunlight and grows on water alone. I was not sure whether it would even grow since by cubicle is not near to the window and I was not sure how plants could survive without proper sunlight. Thank god, its still alive and kicking!!! The pic on right is taken on the day I bought it in. The one below I took today from office. As you can see it has grown significantly. (By 1.2 cm in height to be exact.)  Of course the pebbles in the bowl is courtesy of Infosys.

I don’t know whether it brings good luck or bad luck, but so far nothing bad has happened. The only thing I am concerned about is that I have something green in my cubicle and enjoys watching it grow. (psst.. keep this a secret…I have heard that plants can feel too. Hence I do run my fingers though its leaves once or twice in a day). Ehmm… and that’s not an indication of side-effects of not having a girlfriend.

I am in the process of adding new stuff to my workplace. So the coming posts would be related to that. Keep checking!

Investment Plan : Save today for a secure tomorrow September 18, 2008

Hi all,

Last weekend at home I did some analysis on investment plan. In you plan well now itself, you can be a crorepati by the time you retire. Banks previously had such a plan which they discontinued due to floating interest rates. Since this is beneficial to everyone, I thought of sharing it with you. (For International readers if any: The post is in INR. Please plan according to your currency). If you feel you don’t want to save/ not interested in investment/ blah blah blah… feel free to move on. Others please read on:

 Please refer attachment at the end of the post:

The plan is very simple; every month deposit a part of your salary in a recurring  deposit account (RD). Let’s say every month you are ready to save Rs.1000. At the end of 7 years you will be Rs.1,21,567. Round it off to the bottom about and start a fixed deposit (FD) for Rs.120,000. You will be getting Rs.1000 per month (PM) from this FD. Now start another RD account (since the previous one has matured after 7 years). So from now on you will be depositing Rs.2000 in the new RD account. This way by the time you retire you will have a FD account of Rs.75,60,000 (75 lacs) and drawing a monthly interest of Rs.63,000.

Rs.1000 is a very low amount that we save. Easily we can save Rs.4000. But  make sure you start two separate account of Rs.2000 so that in case of emergency you can close one of them. If you deposit Rs.4000 you will be having an FD account of Rs.3,02,40,000 (3 Crores) and a monthly interest of Rs.2,52,000!

I have done all the possible permutation and combination to arrive at the right amount. After 7 years our salary is going to be at least twice what we are earning now. But anyway I have taken the least amount (4000) and also rounded it off to the lower value for FD. Also, the bank interest rate is 10.50% pa, but I have taken it as 10% only. Feel free to tweak it and make use of the link provided below to calculate amount at maturity. My actual plan is something different which increments Rs.2000 after the 7^th year and it comes to 5 Crores (You can tweak this plan easily, see the second sheet of attachment).

Misc Information:

• Bank interest rate may change in future. It may increase/decrease. To be on the safer side, start an account for a longer term with higher interest rate.
• ICICI bank interest rates are low (as usual). Its just 9.50% wheras other bank gives 10-11%
• If your parents are bank employees, you get higher interest rates if it’s a joint account
• The sooner you start, the better. If you keep postponing, the lesser benefits you will reap in the end.

You may think that what the use of having 3 crore by 60 years? Well, you will have rich children, you don’t have to be dependant, buy a BMW , or do anything you want. After all its your money.

Finally, thanks to my father coz if not for him, I could have never known of such ways for a safe future!(of course you would have already guessed that I could have never come with such a thing ). I will be putting up the same in my blog also. In case of any doubts regarding the attachment, feel free to comment

Tools:

Federal bank RD calculator here http://www.federalbank.co.in/Calculators/RecuringDepositPlanCalc.aspx

Attachment:

Note: Rename .doc to .xls to open

Rd-Fd Investment Plan

World’s Top 20 MBA B-Schools: Interesting facts September 13, 2008

I was casually browsing though Indian School of Business (ISB) site to checkout its admission procedures and other stuff. Out of curiosity, I wanted to see its position compared to other B-Schools. I had heard that ISB is one of the best in world. And it was there, at Rank 20 in Financial times top 100 global MBA schools.

Some of the data out there caught my attention. University of Pennsylvania: Wharton is at Rank 1, Stanford University GSB at Rank 4 and Harvard Business School is at Rank 5. The weighted salary of the three schools in dollars were 165,859, 167,225 and 162,316 respectively. Wheras the weighted salary of ISB is 169,355; the highest in top 100 MBA schools. The employment % is at 93,94 and 94 respectively whereas in ISB its 100%. Interesting I should say.